Dear Filly,
Can I have some song recommendations?
Sincerely, Musical Marley
Dear Marley,
Let me put you on. I’m an exceptionally musically inclined horse! Obviously, bands like Coltplay and Mare-oon 5 are great, but let’s not be basic… We’ll start with classic rock: I’m, like, the biggest fan of Van-Neigh-len, as well as Whinny Against the Machine! But my most favorite… Trötley Crüe! My favorite song? Easy, “I Wanna Hold Your Hoof” by The Beatles. Duh!
Oh, and let’s talk musicals too! Bear with me now, Filly hasn’t always been the biggest fan, but recently I’ve felt a stirring in my soul. I saw “Phantom of the Opera” the other night, and I’m telling you, the second Christine sang “In sleep he reined to me, in dreams he neighed,” I was transported!
Sincerely, Filly
Dear Filly,
Where can I get a parking pass on campus?
Sincerely, Ticketed Terry
Dear Terry,
Head over to Evans Hall ASAP! It’s right behind D-Hall, across from Bowen; you pass it on the left when you’re headed to the south lot! Make sure to bring your driver’s license and license plate number. You better hurry though, I think they’re giving out tickets now!
Lucky for me, I don’t need a parking pass… Filly goes where she pleases! But I did get a ticket once, and they said they were gonna make me wear a sticker on my CROUP! OUTRAGEOUS!!! It was horrible… Fortunately, I talked to ABAC PD, and they were like, “You’re a horse??? Not a car???” so I ended up not needing one!
Sincerely, Filly